One nation, purple or maybe plum, with goofiness for all:
But that doesn’t mean we have nothing in common. We must always remember that, as Americans, we all have a common enemy - an enemy that is dangerous, powerful and relentless. I refer, of course, to the federal government.I speak from personal experience. For the past year, I have been hounded by an organization calling itself “the United States Department of Commerce,” which apparently is linked to the federal government.
Every few weeks, the “Department of Commerce” sends me a threatening letter, demanding that I fill out “the 2002 Survey of Business Owners and Self-Employed Persons (Form SBO-1 or SBO-2).” This is a questionnaire that asks, among other things, whether I am a Samoan. The “Department of Commerce” claims that I have to fill this out because of something that was in my federal tax return.
Dave Berry in his finest hour. (Via shonk)
The Graphing Calculator Story:
I used to be a contractor for Apple, working on a secret project. Unfortunately, the computer we were building never saw the light of day. The project was so plagued by politics and ego that when the engineers requested technical oversight, our manager hired a psychologist instead. In August 1993, the project was canceled. A year of my work evaporated, my contract ended, and I was unemployed.I was frustrated by all the wasted effort, so I decided to uncancel my small part of the project. I had been paid to do a job, and I wanted to finish it. My electronic badge still opened Apple’s doors, so I just kept showing up.
If you have ever used a Mac, you have used this program. (Via Slashdot)
THE 10 BEST URBAN LEGENDS IN FILM HISTORY:
URBAN LEGEND #4. The suicide along the Yellow Brick Road.The legend: A stagehand committed suicide during the filming of “The Wizard of Oz” by hanging himself from a tree in the haunted forest set. If you watch the film, you can see his body dangling in the background in the sequence where the Wicked Witch warns the Scarecrow and Tin Woodsman not to aid Dorothy.
Did it really happen? (Via DiVERSiONZ)
Try to stay sober tonight, at least while you are on the road. (SA image via Agnosiophobia)